fyi.....
...garnet.terri... is taking a hiatus from the blogsphere.
emails are welcomed .... garnetterri@gmail.com
....until.
g.

[[52WeeKS]]

11, december, 2008
.
.
((thoughts)) "Imagine waking up one morning and finding a piece of yourself you didn't even know existed." - Jodi Picoult -
.
.
((words)) Every day of my life, I live to learn. I live to experience something that will have a positive impact on me. In my quest to change the world, I must make an attempt to let life happen; controlling that which I can, but, accepting that which I can not. I made a promies [52 weeks] to let go... let go of those that have an unnecessary hold on my life; let go of that which keeps me sheltered; let go of the things that knowingly make me unhappy. It is amazing how much I shield other people's feelings in order to protect our relationship(s) - but, that just adds tension to me and mine. So far, I have realized its the simple things that make me happy. I speak as I desire. I think uncontrolled thoughts. I suppress feelings. If I love you, I tell you. If I like you, I tell you. But, if I don't desire to carry you into the next season - - - I freeze. I freeze solid in my tracks as if I'm a child that is not tall enough to climb out of the avalanche. I walk blindly, trying my darndest not to hurt whomever is ahead of me. But, then I remember my place. My place is a sheltered place. I am supposed to listen and not speak. I am supposed to agree, not show an opinion. Right? Wrong! The people I met then didn't know me, but I was young and naive. I looked up to them. But, the me I was then is not the me I am now. [52 weeks] I will not reach the complete Garnet until I wake up at the gates of heaven - because then I would've learned everything God needed me to know. I apologize for hurting you, dissapointing you or upsetting you. I'm glad I excited you, made you smile, made you happy. But - 52 weeks - we will see where I am, where the road leads me and where the wind blows me. In 52 weeks I will be happy. I will be changed. I will be alone. This is my solidarity. This is my serenity. I ate, now I will pray, but all in all i will love: most importantly, myself first than others. [52 weeks]
.
.
((the purpose)) i am not a writer. i am a thinker. i am not an adult. i am, merely, a child living in an adults world. i am not perfect. i try to love, more than anything else. i try to help, even if i am not sure how. but my purpose is to change the world. yes, i have big dreams, i have high hopes, and i have enough faith to claim it as my reality. no, i am not trying to change the world because of Barack Obama. no, i am not trying to change the world because there is a recession. i am trying to change the world because i was born. i was not born to ride on the backs of my ancestors. i was not born to walk the path of the former walking abled people. i was not born to assist in the projects that were once started by someone that is now famous. i am here to make a difference based on what i know, what i love, what i cherish and the vision i have.
.
i am in japan, yes. i am a teacher, yes. i love my children, yes. if someone asked me who my idol was, i would say noone because i do not idolize anyone in the flesh. but, if someone, in turn, asked me who my hero was i would say them. well, who is them? them are the children that i teach. them are the children i have yet to teach. them are the children that i met when i volunteered. them are the girls that i was a big sister to in college. them are the youth in the world that are naive to the bitterness and hate of life. i may be mature, but my maturity comes form paying attention and knowing my place. why children? children still have hope, adults are usually set in their ways. you can help children be what they want to be, because they think the sky is the limit, as they should.
.
.
.
... [52 weeks] will continue.
...please come again,
g.

happy.thanksgiving

.
27.november.2008
.
.
in a place where they do not observe, reserve, or celebrate the best holiday in my book, i still give thanks. every day i wake up and give thanks for another day in the life, my life.
.
i am thankful for GOD, my mother, my father, my brother, my life. I am thankful for my best friend, my breath, and my sexy six. I am thankful for Toy and Jai, Jin and Jay. I am thankful for Yoshi. I am thankful for my experiences, my opportunities, and my travel experience(s). I am thankful for my generational gaps in my family (yes, they are ridiculously significant to me). I am thankful for love...
.
i could go on for seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, decades, generations, centuries, eternity .....
Thanksgiving is not just a day, it is a lifelong experience.
.
I am thankful for life, but surprisingly, I am thankful for death. I am thankful for babies, yet I am thankful for adults. I am thankful for lyrics, and I am thankful for rhythms. I am thankful for food, but also thankful for hunger. I am thankful for sight, but also thankful for blindness. I am thankful for hearing, but deafness. I am thankful for endowments, and struggles. I am thankful for debates and agreements. I am thankful for intellect and ignorance. I am thankful for all that makes me whole, and the things that make me incomplete ... for those things are what keep me living instead of merely existing.
.
happy thanksgiving,
what are you thankful for?

rememberance....

13. November. 2008

.

.
.
Remembering Fall 2008. May You All Rest in Peace.
.
. Lille Mae Jordan Tabor
. Zenobia Hikes
. Leon Gillard
. Mrs. Oatis
. Delthea Bryson

21 years, + 1

(november 10, 2008)
,
. . the scene:
. november 11, 2007 8:20 pm .
. location: cheesecake factory, atlanta, ga
. it all started with a birthday dinner with me and the bro in atlanta georgia. we had just had a crazy talk with the waitress about how we were twins, and she was a twin too. then my mother called, my phone, to speak to my brother, yeah, that was weird. anywho, she told him whatever she told him and he then handed the phone to me. i was slightly confused because he had a blank stare on his face. well earlier that day a friend called me to ask me how i was because of the unwanted circumstances. but i digress. my mother then asked to speak with me as the words left her mouth ... i could tell she had been crying "geeper died." thats all i got, so i was confused, clearly. "um, what do u mean?" clearly i am intelligent and i know what death is and i know who geeper was so why didnt those words mean anything to me at that point. she spoke longer and longer but the room just stopped, the air stopped, the noise stopped, i think i went deaf temporarily, then i chimed back in. "mom, my brother died today?" she responded "yes." i dont even remember saying i love you to her, or good bye, i think i just hung up the phone. we sat in silence for a minute, got our dessert to go, i think, and said "we have to go now." my brother wouldn't let me go home i had to go to his place and i had to sleep on the couch our brother gave him for his apartment. i couldnt sleep all night. i was in such shock, in awe, just confused. which, to me, was rather interesting, because i had the feeling a month earlier oct. 19th while receiving the news about Fe. life is crazy sometimes. its crazy how you play this game knowing you cant get out alive .... its crazy.
.
.
. so, again, i ask... "what do you say about a man that leaves you speechless, not because you do not have any words to say but because the words you think up are not good enough." what do you say about a man that is kind, intelligent, loving, silly, admirable, honest and God-fearing. what do you say about a man that was always there for you even when you dont remember asking him to be. what do you say about a man that leaves your life, because God called him home. all i can think to say is "thank you God, and Geep I love you."
.
.
.God - i say thank you for allowing him into heavens gates with no hesitation. i say thank you for letting me have him for so long. i thank you for letting him be a son, and a husband. i thank you for letting him be a brother and an uncle. i thank you for letting him be a godfather and love sports. i thank you for giving him a voice that quiets every noise. i thank you for giving him the jokes to keep me smiling. i thank you for giving him the drive to work through the pain. i thank you for his rumination of love. i thank you for his spirit. i thank you for not letting him suffer. i thank you for the liberation.
.
.
.Geep, i say i love you because i mean it. i say i love you because you helped me through so much and taught me so much more. i love you because you were a brother to me. i love you because you loved me. i will never forget what was said that day in july leaving the car wash and heading to the potato place. im not sure why you said it, but i thank you for saying it. im sure it was God telling me and not u, but i got the message. this has been the longest year of my life, it has seemed like forever. but im thankful for the 21 years before this one ... they will forever be in my mind heart and spirit. i miss you, and i love you.
.
.
. always, garnet.terri
. oh, im sure you had a party but, Obama won! im sure he appreciates your vote too ;-)

hmmmm...

6. November. 2008

so - i dont really have anything to say.
but, as promised, for the next 8 years of my life
(minus those days that i dont have access to the internet)
i will comment on the wonderful changes being made in my nation!
yes its mine ... i own it, just kidding.
but seriously - our nation has made some major strides,
in the past year and 9 months!
in february of 2007 a qualified black man ran for presidency.
no, not the first to run, but the first to get nominated,
the first to win!
barack obama, seen through the eyes of men and women, children, dogs, random animals,
martians, mutants, angels and GOD is the president of the USofA.
...one nation, under GOD!
thank God it is an OBAMAnation ...
thats love.

((i am garnet and i approve this message!))

prayers...

5. november. 2008

...for Obama
.
.

Prayer of Thanksgiving with the election of President Elect Barack Obama

.
God we thank you for the election of President Elect Barack Obama. We thank you for showing us in him a new song to sing. We thank you for his example of diligent hard work, careful planning, inclusion and involvement on every level for every person who desired to participate. In his election we see living proof that you have not forgotten your children who were brought to these shores in slavery, endured the indignity of segregation, and the crises of contempt in modern civilization. We pray for the safety of our new president and his family. We pray that you will order his steps in a way that is pleasing to you. We pray that his election will not only increase prosperity and wealth in America, but that it will spark a positive change in attitude around the world. Under his leadership we pray that America will find new ways to feed the hungry, heal the sick, provide work to those who are unemployed, care for the elderly , educate the young and lead a war torn world to the altar of peace. Through Jesus Christ our Lord we pray. Amen.

.

.
(Please share this prayer)
Written by Rev. Nicholas Hood III
Pastor of the Plymouth United Church of Christ
600 E. Warren Ave.
Detroit, Michigan 48201
www.puccdetroit.org

...no.words.

i think,
for the next 8 years,
every day i am going to write somewhere
I HAVE A BLACK PRESIDENT!
(garnet approves that message)

just for giggles

speechless...

Barack Obama is president of the United States of America.
So sad, but McCain conceded.... oh well.
I want every paper in the world on my doorstep.
Wow!
Im speechless.
Even in Japan, they love Obama!

change.hope.history.

today is november 4th 2008
it is the day that this chapter of history will be completed.
now, in the completion of history one of two things can happen,
the outcome is unknown right now.
but Barack Obama made history becoming the first black democratic nominee.
now, election day is here...
nervous.anxious.excited.
history in the making...

11.02.1986

.

.

((written in the last moments of 21hood))

.

.

As I think about my life in these days, in these times, I am eternally grateful for favor. I have chosen to start my new year off with a clean head, a clean heart, a clean spirit, a clean house, clean everything. I feel like age is irrelevant if you dont grow and mature. "When I was a child I thought like a child, [I acted like a child, I ate like a child, I played like a child, I did everything like a child]... but when I became a (wo)man..." Every day I praise God for the favor He has bestowed upon me. When I entered college all I planned was to graduate in May of 2008 with a job making at least what my parents spent for my first year of undergrad. Well, so far so good - I graduated in December of 2007 and had a job that started me out with a salary HIGHER than that of which my parents paid for my first year of undergrad. Halle! Now that, that is favor. As I look at my life I realize a few things (as mentioned in a previous post). But, there are things that I cannot change, I accept them, but for those things that I can change, I am making an honest attempt to do so. I am Garnet, genuinely affectionate, respectful, naive, energetic and tenacious ... and with qualities like that, why can't I have a perfect life. Now, God may not have made us perfect, but how exactly does one define perfection. God put me on this Earth with a mission and a purpose. As long as I try my best to fulfill that purpose, my life is perfect. My happiness is granted in everything that I do because all everything I do is going to work towards the betterment of society and fulfilling my purpose.

.

I have noticed that I am talented. I can do things on my own. My parents raised me to be interdepent but dependent in my solidarity. I plan to keep moving in the direction I am headed because where can I go from here? Up! I can go up towards the heavens, because thats where my eternity lies. I can go up towards educational advanacement because I have the ability and drive to do so. I can go up on the health chart - why not live a full healthy life? I mean hey, I do control that! I can go up on the fun chart ... everything I do can be fun, I mean, the only people that get bored are boring people, right Mo? I can go up in religion, up in spirituality, up in fashion, up in honesty, up in friendship, up in interdependency, up in familial respect, up in love, up in life. And as my numbers go up and up and up, I plan to grow and mature and season myself into "one that leaves people speechless, not because they don't have anything to say but because the words they think up are not good enough." I want to live a life to make those that preceeded me in death happy. I want to live a life that makes my parents proud. I want to live a life that puts a smile on my brothers face. I want to live a life that makes me happy. But, most importantly, I want to live!

.

I no longer want to exist, because, quite frankly, I think thats what I have been doing. I do not want to plan so much, I just want life to happen. I do not want to control much, I just want things to fall into place. I do not want to restrict myself, why not try everything once? I want to live in prosperity. My favorite number is two so I claim this to be one of the best years of my life. I said once that I made the best choice to come to Japan, now, I am making my next choice my even better best choice ... to live, love, laugh ... that is my goal for the next 365 calendar days, and the beginning of the rest of my life.

.

Not sure of how many people will read this, or even care that I wrote this, but I do know this will be the happiest birthday I could possibly have. I love me and you should too ;-) Happy birthday to the jewel that was created 22 years ago today.

.

Love.

iDig.

[Tears are words the heart can't express...

music is love in search of a word...]

copyright .Zing. 2008

.

.

.

iDig simply because the truth is resonating through these words.

iDig because music is the best expression of feelings,

but it never says what people can read,

just fills you with a feeling of definition.

Tears are simply a way of your heart speaking truth.

you hear it. you feel it. you want to speak it,

but, there are no words.

.

as i remember Dean [Dr.] Zenobia Hikes,

Gerald Miller Bailey,

Lille Mae Tabor,

Willis Clinton Tabor,

Henry C. Conerway, Sr.,

Levy Belle Sullivan Conerway,

Terri George Mills Ossman

Felicia Robinson,

Arin Adams,

H. Eugene Conway,

Monet Little,

Desmond Brumsfield,

Feets,

the list goes on and on and on,

there are no words.

.

You cry tears in the time of struggle,

because there are no words to express your pain.

You cry tears in your moments of joy,

because no words are good enough to express your happiness.

You cry tears in your moments of uncertainity,

because there are no to express your frustrations.

You cry tears at night,

sometimes because you cant find the prayer that God needs to hear.

You cry tears in the morning,

because you cant believe the thoughts you had last night.

You cry tears because-

the English language has yet to create the words that define your situation;

-but, God created music.

.

God created music so you could feel the vibration,

the vibration that will add light to any situation.

God created music for that feel good moment,

that moment that makes you smile and completely describes-

possibly defines, your current situation.

God created music to help the mute speak-

God created music to help the studdering to speak clearly-

God created music to help that one person form a sentence of emotions-

God created music becuase it is a universal language,

it is the one language that u do not have to attempt to translate.

God created music so our hearts can communicate what our minds get stuck on.

.

Tears are words the heart can't express...

music is love in search of a word...

[copyright .Zing. 2008]

.

the wings to fly.

the ears to hear.

the eyes to see.

the hands to touch.

the fingers to feel.

the tongue to taste.

.

tears + music create a life worth living.

i am because u are.

we are because they do.

it all makes sense.

.

.

.

copyright.g.2008

love.

.the.nia.of.SC....

Rest in Peace

Dr. Zenobia L. Hikes

our Spellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllman Sister

our NIA

((re))visiting:.love.

[26, october, 2008]

Just a little motivation:

.
man: I wanna woman I wanna be married
.
woman: are u happy now? like in your state of your life? can u honestly say you are happy?.
.
man: Happpy with what?
.
woman: your life, in its entirety. are you, ---, happy?
.
man: 95%
.
woman: well in that 5% your wife will come, as i heard today, from joel osteen, when you can be 100% happy in the life you have God will grant you the life you want
.
man: Really thts kewl
.
woman: yea ... so like me, im in love with a man who i want to be my husband. but i figure if i become happy with our current situation and with myself ... someone (else) will want to love me. its like, my personal theory is this ... why not fall in love with yourself? i mean it is YOU that you want someone else to fall in love with, right? not on a conceited tip, but just generally. love your image. love your personality. love your intelligence. love your negativity and your positive picture. and im SURE someone else will fall for you ...
.
man: That's deep....
.
woman: thanks, but is also very simple. think about it, if every day you are like "i hate my body." why on earth would you think someone else would want to look at it?
.
man: ok, so maybe im at 75%
.
woman: lol ... so baby boy, get to 100% ... then u can get you a younger tender that can keep you living and stop you from existing.God isnt finished with you yet, thats why you are alive ... so make your days worth living! ya dig?
.
man: I dig
.
woman: and me, no im not worried, thank u very much. but i love love, i love family and i enjoy the thought of honestly being in love with my best friend (not in the literal sense) and the two of us having a great life together, for me its different, its like im experiencing life but its not really that fun to talk to anyone about what i experience .... i want that special conversation at night with that special person ... so, u will be married, and u will have a wife, pray on it and accept it, hard as simple as it is
.
just my thoughts on another day.
love.

villages.nightmares.blood.

[23 october 2008]
so, maybe you thought this was about halloweens near approach. or maybe it was about a student in my class. nope - its about family, and how much i love them.
i dont know if people know that i appreciate them but here i am going to make an attempt to name everyone that comes to mind .... my village, both then now and forever ;-)
((in no particular order))
...mommy (garnet known as mo): i love you honeybunches! now, if you have never met my mom she is the epitome of cool, the definition of fly, the last puzzle piece to the enigma we call life. my mom is like the best woman ever. she is super smart, like, forreal, dont try to play her in scrabble, and if u do, never challenge her, u will lose! but moreso than that she is my friend, not my bestest of bestest best best best but shes the bf. now, i have a bff, who i will get to later, but she is just (ma, there are no words). she is everything u want to be but you will never really get to her level because God created a new level for her that is just unreachable for the average person. she has taught me thinks that, well, i will love her forever because she taught them to me. (lol). simple things like, when i was 2(ish) I was fighting sleep once and she said "you know you can go to sleep when you are sleepy, right?" and i said "really? im going to bed now!" now, to you that may not be a big deal, but to me it was like "ahhhhhh" the gates to heaven have let me in! she was that mom that always nursed you to health and never got sick. she was that mom that made sure she was on every field trip (except toronto, sorry) and always the group leader of everyone, lol. she was the mom that sold so many girl scout cookies I got tired and she passed them out. she was the mom that held me down through therapy, to make sure i still got into college. she is still that mom that proofreads all of my papers, calls me at random times just because she had something funny to say or a question to ask. she married my father, and Lord knows (well, ill get to him in a minute, *smile*). she raised 2 blood children, 9million sons, a gazillion babies, and some grandparents, all in a days work. my mom is the greatest.
.
...popdiddly: ok so, my dad is the funniest man on the face of this earth. but unbeknownst (um, yea, you know what i mean) to most people, he may know more things than my mom ... real talk. he is the funny laid back guy that was at every concert, all the dinners, and luncheons, every daddy daughter dance, suffered through debutante dance lessons, took me shopping, bought me stuff, taught me instrumentation and musicality, helped me disect random animals, like EVERY fish that died in our fish tank, supported me through bates, renaissance, spelman, japan ... my dad is the greatest. love you man! he is that father that may not agree with what you are doing at the time, but before he lectures you he will find some way to slide in at least one positive message just to let u know he was listening and does care about your desires. he is the guy thatll scold you and make sure you know that what you did was stupid, but, at the end of the day, he loved you first. ive gotten so many traits from my father, im so glad God blessed me with him. its crazy how people say you cant pick your family, well, if i had to, id pick the same clowns that love me now. daddy is that one guy that you may never fully understand, but youre glad you get him enough. love you pops!
.
...skipper-roo: henry, i love you. im not mushy, i promise, but i love you. i do. i am impressed by your drive and your intellect. you take your time to get there, but when you do, its the masterpiece that noone was expecting. i cant wait for you to have some rugrats, i think you will be one of the best fathers on the face of this planet. you are definitely someone i have always looked up to and will always. mom and dad always used to tell us "we are gonna die, but you will have each other forever, you are each others best friends and you better keep it that way." in our own screwed up little situation, we are best friends. now, do we know everything about one another? no! but trust, im gonna hold u down and i know you will hold me down, its in our blood.
.
...POODA: oh you thought bff was gonna be revealed? ha! yeah right ... ((yes mom, you know who the bff is... home depot, pizza hut, computers.... yea think about it)). well, hes my bff, i love him dearly. he is everything you never wanted but something that you always needed. he understands me and i understand him. thats that. i love you.
.
... sexy six: crichet, ron b., california sunshine, courtie bourtie, noey .... wow, its been so long. you all are blood, as far as im concerned, you all love me in some strange way, but im glad you do. i dont see u enough or say it enough but i love you all.
.
...tabor/conerway/conway/briggs/ice..... too many names but they all rooted from somewhere, i love you. its too many to give you each a paragraph but i love you. i love you. i love you. thank you for loving me too.
.
...extended family: thank you for the job reccommendations, the recommendation letters, the babysitting jobs, the road trips, the food, the beds, the cars, the dates, the outtings, the everything. i dont have enough words and enough energy to begin to say thank you to everyone, but if you dont know i love you I LOVE YOU!
.
...southfield moms&mentors: i was talking to a friend last night about a situation. you often wonder where your feet will take you, but its always interesting to find out. i do know one thing, i love you guys. if i took the letters out of your titles you would still hold me down and that is why i can say i love you and will see you soon .... love.
.
.
im sure there are more people that i love and i cant call by name, forgive me. but know you loved me first, or maybe i loved you first, but the point is we are loved, by each other, today! i love you, i thank you, i miss you.
.
.
just thoughts, just love, just me
sayonara.

skype me baby ...

22, october, 2008
.
.
so toy and i were having our regularly nightly morning conversation. and todays random profound psychic comment was this .....
.
.
.
me: "so, i think im going to stop talking to him. i forget how much i love him sometimes. its like i fall in love with him all over again every time we have a conversation. sometimes i fall in love several times in the conversation. you know, those aha moments like wow i really love him?"
.
toy: "have you ever just tried turning those thoughts off?"
.
me: have u ever tried to ignore love? it just holds u captive and smacks u in the face[. love is that one emotion that can take you to your highest highs and lowest lows but loves you enough to only share the highs with u ... maybe some mids every now and again. love is a release, its a drug that you are forever addicted to or never want to try and sometimes a little bit of both. love is dumb! [lol.] love is oxymoronic and violent but soft and gentle. love plays hide and seek very well but when u forget to look for it sometimes it scares the buhJESUS out of u.
.
just thoughts on paper ...

real.eyes...realize...real.lies

...

...

[22 october 2008]

...

"my eyes are green, 'cuz I eat a lot of vegetables"

...

2 months, soon approaching, but so much has been revealed.

i have realized i have been lying to myself for far too long.

ok, maybe not lying, that sounds extreme.

but i was sure scared to be introduced to myself.

have you ever been introduced to yourself?

it is a very strange reality check.

but since i have been in japan, i have realized quite a few things about myself.

... here goes something (or nothing, depending on how you look at it, i consider it positive improvement, but you can consider it negative reinforcement.)

.

.

1. my name is garnet, it means red, it also means flower and it is also a stone, but in japanese its ganetto (though they can actually say garnet, its kind of funny)

.

2. my middle name is terri (no im not giving u the full government) and my aunt used to call me little terri, i honestly hated it because i thought she just didnt know my name. i also hated it because i was not little terri, that meant i wasnt an individual.

.

3. i love to read. whoever told me i couldnt understand stuff lied, lol, just kidding, i really cant. but i like reading. i may not remember what i read before but i like reading in the moment, the revelations are amazing.

.

4. im a control freak. why didn't you all tell me this? sheesh! its an interesting control freak-ism though. but it explains a lot.

.

5. i hold family in the highest esteem. no i dont talk to my family every day, but cross them and its not a good look for u.

.

6. i love to write. im not that good at it but i love doing it.

.

7. i love teaching, maybe not in the professional setting, but i love helping out the people that have not had a chance to help themselves out.

.

8. i love love. i am in love. thats all!

.

9. i have a best friend. (no mo, not u, lol) that best friend means more to me than i ever realized. that friend epitomizes the ((garnet)) definition of a best friend ... maybe tutu or someone said this, but, the defintion being "the person that knows u best."

.

10. i met my soul mate once. i just now realized i didnt want to be with him forever; HOWEVER, he was a mirror for me, the person that showed me everything that was holding me back, the person that brought me to my own attention so i could change my life.

.

11. i wear my wishbone where my backbone should be.

.

12. im a dreamer.

.

13. im determined.

.

14. im very focused. people often told me i was not focused and i had thoughts all over the place but my mom saw it, everything i do comes back to the same goal.

.

15. last (for now) "I'm scared of the future because of the scar the past left on my heart, so its hard for me to open my present and accept it as a gift..." (c) Garnet 2008

.

.

.

this is my post for today,

love.

i found my husband ...

[12, october, 2008]

so, today i decided im going to get on the workout grind for real. and, well, im cheap, so, all that "lets join a gym, lets buy weights, lets ..." is for the birds. y cant i just take advantage of my two phenomenal modes of transportation (my legs, and my bike). both of those are good for cardio, right? hey, why not .... im more active here than ive EVER been in my life! i did the gym thing, but it only worked when i had my fabulous trainer (props to j.dunn) and instructor for groups lessons (yay for syd). but in atlanta, yea right, i hated that stupid gym and i was not motivated to run on anyones treadmill. i hated running all together, most of the time.

so, i got up today, hung up my clothes, (yes i have a washer but no dryer, which i will get to shortly) ate some frosted flakes, and went for an (at least) 8 mile bike ride. I live in Japan and the mountains are beautiful, but i can only see them in the distance. so, today i decided to take a trek just to see where i live. the vegetation is beautiful here. as i was riding i saw some restaurants, some shops, some homes, a baseball diamond with what appeared to be a little league game, some ravens (those birds are ridiculously huge), some ladies walking their dogs, and again ... the mountains. as i listened to my ipod, the motivation playlist (better known as gospel) i thought, i want to marry Jesus. i know that sounds crazy because im DEFINITELY already married to Jesus. But today, i thought it in the thankful sense.

all of my life i have loved fast cars, expensive shoes, and fine dining. blame it on whoever you want, but, i realize, i came here to be reintroduced to the simple things. i love the fact that i can walk and just see the world. i never realized why grandma never got her license, but driving allows you to miss a lot of stuff. i see random shops, and whats in them. i am able to truly look at the architecture(sp?) and admire it. i am able to look at the children running about and smile at them. i am able to look at the spiders and think "oh what web we weave." i am able to watch the birds fly, look at the flowers, shoot, smell the air.

i love it here. but more importantly, i love being at a point where i am able to truly fall in love with me. falling in love with love was fun, but then it became depressing, lol. falling in love with yourself is a wonder in the world of wonders. it does not form conceit, but instead it allows you to understand what u truly love, want, and need in your life. it allows you to understand wealth, both financially and personally.

that is my blog for today...
love.

flamingos and puerto ricans

...
...
a simple conversation began about God and how he works. a friend and i began talking about her life and how God already claimed it to be, of course more was said than that. but we began the topic of careers and words began to manifest in my thoughts and i began to write them down on paper. sometimes i have great ideas that i would like to share, and other times i just like to hear myself talk. well, this time, i dont know what it is/was but this is what it came to be...

Friend::..
you always have interesting emails,
and blogs

Me::..
oh, thank you
i want to write a blog today aobut our pizza party at work, but i dont feel like it, lol
i just honestly feel like my purpose in this life was to change minds one person at a time, thus changing the world...
i usually use myself to "minister" to the world because ive been through a lot
there are some things i have never experienced (like a broken heart from an ex-boyfriend)
but the biggest thing people NEED in life, to change, is death; and Lord knows ive experienced that
so i see most things VERY differently than the average joe ... and i just feel like if i say something it will touch someone ...
and just little things like i know EXACTLY what i want to do in life, now, getting there, God only knows... but people have always told me "ur all over the place" no, i have a lot of interests, yes, but i am very focused.
i want to help people.
yes, i could be a doctor, but how many people do you REALLY help
or i could be a simple psychologist, and do therapy
but why cant i be a business woman, a philanthropist, a counselor, a researcher, and an inventor (of sorts)
God created this simply complex individual for some reason, why cant i use all of my thoughts for the greater good and goal of happiness?
((and this is my new blog))
thanks ;-)

Addendum: since I'm here ....
I know my blog is grammatically incorrect; however, I use certain writings for emphasis, thank you for understanding.
.
Now, about this pizza party ...
We had a pizza party at work today. We ordered 3 medium pizzas (meat lovers, chicken teriyaki, bacon and mushroom), 1 large lasagna, 5 chicken nuggets with cheese in them, 5 spicy chicken wings, small potato wedges, large potato wedges. Now, with this order we received 1 fork, 3 packs of hot sauce, and the food. Mind you, this was an order for 8 people. The pizzas were the size of a bambino, ok, MAYBE a small pizza from an American Pizza Hut. The lasagna could have easily filled one hungry black man, actually, it wouldve been his appetizer. There were no plates, we used paper. There were no napkins, rarely ever are in Japan, so we used kleenex. There were no utensils so we tore the dividers from the boxes (they were about the size of an insert that goes in a mens dress shirt under the collar) and made spoons.
...
It was a very interesting "lunch date." Its always funny because ALL of our conversations are bilingual, usually the JTs (nihon-jin sensei) speak nihongo and then they will speak a bit of english and the FTs (amerika-jin sensei) will usually speak english and then speak a bit of japanese. Anywho, todays discussion was on recycling.
...
They are ANAL about recycling. the plastic bottles must be separate from the plastics and you must remove the labels and tops. The burnables (paper, food) are separated. The aluminum is separated. The glass is separated. The biggest problem in all of this is EVERYTHING comes individually packaged so it takes a lot to separate things. And, when people dont know where or how to recycle it they usually just take it to 7/11 and recycle it. The craziest thing about this is the garbage men have to separate the separated trash. So, if you recycle wrong, you are making someones job even worse.

and that, my friends, is my new blog.
ahava...

(now that you have reached the end of the blog

i am sure you have noticed that the blog had NOTHING to do with flamingos

OR Puerto Ricans, but it popped in to my head so i wrote it down, lol, love.)

Nippon ... Nihon .... Nihon-jin

People continue to ask me to write more, but there is so much to say that I don't know where to begin. As you all know I am in Nippon, also known as Nihon, better known as Japan. I take an adventure every day of my life now ... adventuring in another country is the best life I could ever ask for. I must say, to all of the people reading this that have not travelled or experienced another culture in some way shape or form, please do so.

A friend of mine, and I, have a continued discussion about how Americans do not have culture. This is a very sad thought but if you think about it, what is the culture? Is your culture giving presents on Christmas Day and shooting guns on New Years. What about - bbqing in the summer and going to the club on Saturday night. Name one thing that is specific to JUST America. Exactly! You are probably still thinking. The only thing that we could come up with was baseball.

But, when you consider nihon-jin (japanese people) they have so much culture, so much wealth, so much prosperity, so much truth, so much! They have specific things they do with their family, which is mostly everything. They vacation as a culture. They do a lot of things. There are some things that I find very interesting about these people though.

Nihon-jin are extremely fashionable. For those that know me know, Im not fashionable or stylish - I just wake up and put on clothes that match. But in Japan everyone has Gucci and Louis Vuitton because its normal. It does not bother them that a purse costs 100,000jpy, thats just normal to them. Its normal to them to go spend their cash at Zara, Gap Woman (exclusive to Japan), Cartier, Louis Vuitton, Gucci and Dolce and Gabana (sp?). It is normal to them to dress their children in the best designer fashion on the face of this planet. It is normal to them to spend more money time and effort on fashion then it is, lets say, transportation. Most people in Japan do not have cars, though they are not a necessity, its just interesting. If I called my most materialistic fashionable friend and suggested he gets rid of his car in order to only wear LV, Gucci, Feragamo (sp?), Cartier, Rock and Republic and shop at Saks and Neimans, I dont know if he would. Though all of those names are big to him, being able to get around is more important because he may be to bougie to catch the public transportation, unless he lives in New York. When I think about necessities in life, it seems to me that the necessities of this country are vastly different form in America. I also find it very interesting that they only use cash. It is very rare that they own credit cards. HOWEVER, they could charge something with their cell phone! Yes, they can use their cellular devices to charge something, crazy, right?

I am making an attempt to learn nihongo (japanese) and it is quite challenging. After you learn the vowels you can spell everything, which is great, but then you dont know what it means, lol. Its also interesting because the rules of japanese language are so intense that if i say akita (uh-kee-ta) they have no idea what i am talking about because they say (ah-kee-tah). Yes, very different in japanese. They have various ways of contact, the syllabification is amazing, and the sentence structure is difficult. Example: akita desu ka. translates to: akita where is question mark. They do not have question marks, periods, etc. They have inflections for most statements and ka represents a question. Its very interesting.

In other news, I went out with my conet, manager and managers husband yesterday and it was so much fun. We started our journey to Osaka at about noon and headed to a mexican restaurant, el pancho, that was GREAT! Then we ventured off into the wonderful world of shopping. It was cold and rainy, but it was a good day. We also went to the international store (jupiter) and got some goodies. Thats all I have to say about that day, I cant remember what I wanted to blog about.

Additionally, yesterday was Sunday which means, CHURCH! So, in church (ray of hope, online) the preacher (rev. jaz, guest preacher, its revival) spoke on the year of new beginnings and coming from behind in order to take over. So yesterday I experienced a Happy New Year type of situation. Since Ive been in Japan I have learned a tremendous amount of information. I have learned about love, prayer, life, self, intelligence, intellectualism, desires, interests, wants, needs, travel, culture, language, decision making, independence, dependency, fake-isms, and probably a host of other things. But, the most important part of the sermon I grasped is "even though you are experiencing an issue you are not the issue." For so long I have been experiencing issues ... life and death, loyalty and dishonor, & love and hate. Everything that bothers me has resolved around those three differences. But the pastor also said something else, "you are at your lowest point today. God is using you to create a new better being and you will never be at this point again. You are not the first to experience what you are experiencing and you wont be the last so you must simply push past this, sew your seed and move on." For those of you that don't know I am a religious and spiritual person. I believe in a higher being and I believe that everything happens for a reason. I have always seen myself as the woman that will change the world, one person at a time. I have always been that girl that will love everyone, often before she loves herself. But now that I am gone, I am realizing so many people and relationships that I had while I was at home were irrelevant. I had a lot of salt inflicted wounds because of the company I kept. I was not a happy person and I was not able to see my unhappiness until I started experiencing happiness. Example: I took care of my grams for the summer as well as my dads puppy. Now, as crazy as it seems I was happiest in the simple moments. I was happiest when lillie mae, yoshi and i would be in the front yard laying, sitting and standing ... talking about random stuff like the leaves on the trees. I was happiest when I would pick grams up and she would talk about Barack Obama, how that woman was so in the know, i still dont know. The days that we talked about why it rains, and why flowers are purple or laughed at yoshi because he is secretly a human - those were the days that I loved. Its amazing that through death I continue to find life. As I looked at Geeper for the last time I knew that I had some sort of purpose. I knew that he fulfilled a purpose that was so great noone could ever forget his memory and the legacy of love he left. When I saw grams take her final breath after I told her she could go now because I could handle it, I felt a sense of rebirth. And in the sermon I realized my storm is not quite over yet, but my rainbow is forming through the raindrops. I like this place I am in now. I like the feeling of creating a person on the basis of love (God creating the Garnet he wants) and me falling in love with that person. If you do not love yourself, first, how do you expect someone to love you unconditionally.

This is my post ....
hope you enjoyed.
ahava

Konichiwa ... Son!

(c) BRIgArNet: Nagoya

Today was a great day!

When I woke up this morning I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Brian and I decided we were going to Nagoya but that meant I had to catch two trains to get there, and last I remember, I do NOT speak japanese! But, alas, I, being the resourceful person I am MADE IT, in one piece on time! As soon as I got to the Nagoya station I got a map and figured out where the Hilton Hotel was (brian and I were meeting outside). It was a nice little trot but the city is beautiful. First stop - LAWSONS for some batteries for my camera and some water. After that I walked under the train station, over the river and safely arrived at the Hilton. As I arrived, this hotel was magnificent. It looked like a ritzy jazz club on the main floor, and it had high class shopping on the second floor. There was a "maserati photo shoot" outside of the side entrance to the hotel. Well, Brian "Mr. Starbuck Addict" was across the street at the Starbucks but we finally found each other. For lunch, we decided against being adventurous and went to the Hard Rock Cafe across from the Hilton. We were both so hungry it was ridiculous. Nagoya is a high business city so there were a lot of black and white people around, it was very strange but very nice. We were planning on going to the aquarium but mr. planner man decided not to find out when it was open until this morning and of course, its closed on monday. So, we decided to go to this garden instead. Instead of taking the subway or a taxi we decided to walk ... yes ... walk ALL FIVE KILOMETERS to this garden. On the way we took a detour over a bridge (which was merely a street overpass) and through a park (that had a magnificent water fountain, a sand field, dogs playing frisbee, a japanese man playing an african drum next to a tent, and japanese business people sitting around maxing and relaxing). After the park we took another detour over another bridge (overpass) and finally got back to our route. We kept walking a little further and found this random group of temples. So, as foreigners we stopped in, walked through and took lots of pictures. Brian then decided he was going to be a Buddhist for the day and attempted to do the traditional Buddhist things but alas, he doesnt speak Japanese nor is he a Buddhist so it was funny watching him attempt these traditions. So, then we decided to stop at 7/11 (yes, they are everywhere) get some more water and attempt to buy our baseball tickets. Well, that 7/11 didnt sell the tickets so we just continued our walk. Probably half way there we looked at the clock and realized it was 4:30, well we only had an our to view this park, so we hailed a taxi. When we got to the park it was beautiful, but again it was a Buddhist park with Buddhist traditions. Again, Brian attempted to be a Buddhist, but this time, all of the natives laughed hysterically. When you enter the park you are supposed to purify yourself by washing your hands and face. Then you are supposed to go to this stairway and clap for the Gods. Then you are supposed to bow on your way out. Well, Brian started at the clapping, lol. Oh rewind ... when we first entered, there were chickens, HUGE chickens, that kept attempting to fly. Where they came from? Not so sure ... I should have stolen one to cook it. Just kidding. LOL. Fast forward... so Brian and I were taking pictures and what not and i started scratching my arm as he began to scratch his leg. We both ignored it and just said, hey, its japan and we probably got the cooties. So on our way to get some MORE water, Brian decided he was going to purify himself. Well, instead of washing his face and hands he washed his hands and drank the water. Lord, I think the japanese people that were purifying themselves almost had a heart attack they were laughing so hard. We finally got to the refreshment area and my arm was now red, Brian said it was the water, I said i didnt drink any. I had 5 mosquito bites and he had 3. We then decided it was time to go. So, we walked over yet another bridge (overpass: I keep calling them bridges because they are massive) and hailed a taxi. This taxi driver was hilarious. He spoke English and of course we were speaking japanese, so we began to laugh at each other. It was great! We got to the train station and then headed to the baseball game. We saw a little boy and Brian had a field day because they both had team clappers and wristbands, it was precious. Moving right along, genius boy decided it was time to get off the train, the boys mother and sister did as well. But the boy stayed on the train and then the mom and sister ran back on and Garnet and Brian are stuck waiting 4 minutes for the next train because we got off a stop early. When we get to the station (ozone, lol, oh-zo-nay) we make our way to the stadium. And of course, the game is sold out, because they go hard with the baseball. So, we get some tickets, cough, and proceed in the stadium. I too bought clappers (they are a necessity in japanese baseball) and we made our way to our seats, oh wait, after getting food. I got a shrimp burger and fries, brian got a steak burger and fries. Both were delish! As the game begins I felt like I was at a college football game. Both teams have pep squads, WITH musical instruments (trumpets, drums, etc.). And, the home team has cheerleaders, ha! This baseball game was awesome. ((Oh and I found a black guy in Japan, he plays baseball for the Dragons, I am trying to plot to meet him, lol.)) Anyway, after the game Brian and I parted (deciding on going to Toba next weekend) and I made it home in one piece.

It was a great day.

Great adventure in Japan.

love.

g.

iPraise (take 2)

www.streamingfaith.com

Ray of Hope Christian Hope

((Rev. Dr. Cynthia Hale))

.

Rev. Taft Quincey Heatley

..."Security is found in God alone"...

Psalm 62: 1-2

today's service was bomb

just what the doctor ordered ;-)

if you cannot get to your church home

(or a church home)

check out streaming faith

...:::UpDaTe:::...

FYI: New Pictures, View Them!

..... that is all!

g.

...request.line...

Welcome to Thursday Night Jams with DJ G Money (ha!) .... any requests tonight?
.
.
.
I guess some people enjoy reading my blog, well now that I am working I dont have a lot of interesting things to blog about ...
maybe i will blog about the TYPHOON that is headed to my city,
or maybe i will blog about how I miss my grandma,
or maybe I could talk about how much i miss my daddy saying crazy stuff randomly
or maybe I could blog about how much I miss the Yosh-myster (my dog yoshi) - and he misses me too
or maybe I could write about how much I miss saying, isnt the drummer your twin
or how about blogging about my mommy and hearing garnetochon like im 3
or maybe about how crazy my family is...
. . . or did you want to hear about japan?
.
.
well, I went for my alien registration card today, that was funny, dude couldnt speak english but he made me write everything in english and my manager was like what, dude, do u know what youre doing? that was funny.
or how about how you have to get garbage bags from the people (dont know what office it was) because they are huge on recycling here and they gave me enough bags through march. and when i run out of bags (if i run out before march) and go get new ones (because you have to go back to that office) they are a dollar a bag, what? are u kidding me?
or maybe i could talk about how im going to turn into a rice ball because i forgot how much i loved it.
or maybe i will talk about how i see the pizza hut delivery man on his skooter EVERY DAY!
oh back up - no really, there is a typhoon coming, who has those, lol.
or i could rewind and talk about how the prime minister quit last week. i repeate he went to work and said "i dont want to do this anymore" and left. what?! and japan is still running smoothly? ha! i wish ...
ok, what do you want to know?
.
.
.
leave your requests now,
love.
g.

holiday.cheer

((i will revisit this post another time))
.
.
.
so, yesterday (september 15, 2008) was grandparents day in japan.
it rained all day, but just sprinkles.
it was supposed to thunderstorm all day.
we (jess,kerin,kerrie+1) took a day trip to kyoto.
first, eating at smile burger, awesome!
second, visiting the temples was amazing.
third, the shopping - it was great!
.
.
.
it was very interesting though because people asked if i was going to talk to my grandparent(s) today and i had the revelation that i no longer had a grandparent; it was a very saddening thought. it is interesting that the first birthday after grandmas death, it rained. it was sprinkling as if she was crying tears on me saying, "im so proud of you doll." it was just a very interesting day. my mood was strange. my feelings were saddened.
.
but, sometimes, life just happens like that.
today is the first day of "work" (almost the real first day) and im sleepy.
i have yet to catch on my sleep from .... whenever i started losing sleep.
its great here, you should come visit.
love.
g.

when in japan, do as the japan do? hmmm...

(please sing with me)

training time is over

now its time to go

good bye

good bye

we are going home

"good bye!"

...

yikes ... training week is over? already? we have had so much fun and tonights, we did everything from EAT DINNER to collect peanuts to laughing hysterically to heading to aussie to finding the canal to asking questions to ... living as the JAPANese do.

i absolutely love it here. i have had time (in this short time) to find out what i want to do, who i am, and what i want to be, for me. i have a firm establishment of beliefs. i have a grasp on reality. and i have a hold on life. i love it. it is interesting that that is the case, seeing as how my life is an adventure.

i am quite anxious to see the person i will be when i return to the states.

love.

g.

iPraise

Greetings,

So... as said before (in a previous post, I believe), I am seemingly the only religious and spiritual person in my current circle, which is fine - to each its own. But, that has had me thinking, a lot. I have thought about my strengths, as well as my weaknesses. I have thought about what I love, also how I can have a strong dislike for other things. I have bene observant. I have been humbled. I have been reminded of so many things. I have had the chance to Praise and the desire to Praise like I have never had before. 

It is amazing how many things God has brought me to and through. I have had the chance to look back on all the things I have been through and still say thank you. I have had the opportunity to wake up and say "this storm is passing over." The largest storm of my life (college) has finally passed, concluding on September 5, 2008. But, I still have a reason to praise. 

As I checked my email today, I received an email that was right on time ...

...

"Lord, teach me the importance of saying thanks. Impress upon me the importance of not only being grateful, but grant me the presence of mind to express my thanks to those who have extended themselves for me. Humble me in order that I might acknowledge my blessings. Remind me that my success in part is due to the kindness and support of others. Grant me the strength, courage and humility to let others know how much they mean to me. Speak to me and I will listen. Encourage me and I shall be lifted. Empower me and I shall be strong. Bless me and I shall bless others and give thanks and praise to your Holy name. Through Jesus Christ our Lord we pray. Amen."

((written by Nicholas Hood, III. Pastor: Plymouth United Church of Christ, Detroit, MI, USA))

...

...

I began this new journey for that ... to journey. I didnt know why I accepted this route. I was not even really sure why God ok'd this journey. But, as the days go by God humbles me, and I laugh and say to myself "He never makes mistakes."

...

Though, I like being in control of things, often, I have to understand that with God, I never know. I try to come up with things. I try to create my own reasons. However, the best is to just stand sitll and know that He is God and He reigns. 

...

...

I did not plan to make spiritual/religious posts on the blog but this is for you all to know my journey and well, spirituality and religiosity is a part of that.

...

...

...

...

...

now ..... i just want to note, there is a live band playing around the corner from me. NOISE does exist in japan, that is REALLY good to know.

...

love all,

g.

return.of.the......

return.of.the...carter.3?
so ... again, as i do every morning, i go to the coffee shop (seattles best) and order my mango with whip. as soon as i sit down i hear "f*$k the police" come through the speakers. OH NO!!!!! iSpy the UNEDITED version.
...
...
...
the most comical thing about the american music in japan is, well other than me not hearing ANY japanese music since i have been here, they don't (im asusming) know what the words mean. they may know the lyrics now, simply because they have been listening to it daily; however, they are playing the unedited version which leads me to believe they dont really know what they are listening to.
...
...
... moving right along...
...
return.of.the....OBAMA!
last night at dinner we (some of my english speaking friends and I) decided to have dinner in the common room (of our "dorm") with some of the native japanese speaking english speakers. so, we were flipping through some australian magazine and there was a picture of the Obama family, Ben Afleck (sp?) and some other randoms. Well, the person reading the magazine asked if they knew Ben and they responded (hesitantly) eh...uh...oh yes, ben... actor...yes. Well (plug: Obama is great, fyi!) A Washingtonian asks, do you know him (pointing to Obama) and everyone says (in unison smiling) "YES YES YES OBAMA! Its barack obama!" I thought that was great. They continue the conversation by telling us about Obama, Japan and how the people there are campaigning for Obama and they have these huge parties just for the Obama campaign. I thikn that is great and I also think I will be showing up to Obama beach and celebrating on November 5, 2008! WOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO... later in the conversation someone asked about McCain and they frowned and i laughed. HA!
...
...
...
return.of.the...CHUCKS!
I just think its great that everyone (ok, maybe not EVERYONE, but a lot of people) wear chucks EVERY day. they have the cutest colors, highs, lows, patterned, solid, everything ... its great!
...
...
...
.chat later,
.g...

iSpy...

...i spy with my little ear LITTLE WAYNE in the atmosphere, as i sit in the coffee shop and drink my mango smoothie with whip cream all i hear is "the carter 3" i dont even hear that at home!
...
...i spy with my little eye A BIDET in the atmosphere, as i go into MCDONALDS to use the toilet and there was a bidet with button sensors on the wall. very high tech i must say ...
...
...i spy with my little eye TWO LAMBORGHINIs, one with suicide doors and both unlocked with no owner around, in sight matter of factly. noone took pictures, no one tried to steal them. gotta love the honor system.
...
...
...
another "iSpy" coming soon.

Day 2: Training

((note to self: stop sharing so many opinions))

...

so, if you know me well, you know i like to talk. but again, if you know me well, you know i dont always talk a lot. though that may have sounded a bit oxymoronic, in simple terms, i know when to be quiet. im not going to blog about my work life, because that is frowned upon. but, just know, everywhere in the world you go, you can always tell the "americans." or maybe it is just a native english speakers thing. i have noticed a lot more people are "know it alls" where as the japanese people allow you to share information with them and they just listen. sometimes they spark conversations, sometimes they dont. but if they are not interested or think you are wrong they simply say "thank you" (in japanese usually).

...

moving on ... i am sad that i have not had time to do much adventuring . . . but this too shall pass. training will be over on saturday which means, MORE PICTURES COMING SOON! i am very excited about that.

...

another major difference in the japanese culture is they are frugile (sp?). i would not say they are a green country at all. they are not into (seemingly) all of that organic stuff and what not. however, they are GREAT at conserving energy. example: in the "dorm" we are staying in you turn the power on with a key. thus, when you leave - in order to lock the doors you must remove the key from the power "lock" and lock the door. this means that all of the lights go off, the air conditioning goes off, the radio, all outlets are turned off, EVERYTHING is controlled by the key. now, i think that is perfect, especially for me, a person that leaves the tv on all night... instead of unplugging everything everyday you can just have one powersource switch that turns it all off. that is genius! (if i do say so myselft)

...

as you know (or not) there are a lot of bikers in japan. i think it is so cute how they line all of their bikes up on these bike racks outside of everything. though the bike racks take up most of the sidewalk they are still extremely convenient and organized. the funny thing about this is you can get tickets on your bike, just like you would for a car. now, i just have to laugh every time i see some because in detroit, if someone put a ticket on your car you probably wouldnt pay it, let alone your bike. now, i dont park illegal so im not the one throwing them away but you americans know EXACTLY what i mean (cough AUC cough). 

...

random facts of life: 

- hagen-dazs makes great tiramisu flavored ice cream, you should try it.

- if you hear "red sauce" in japan, it means ketchup (i had an "omellette(sp?)" (eggs over rice) today and it had "Red sauce" on it ... disgusting!

- everything you need as an international person in japan is labeled in english, stop and look for the english!

- according to brian, the cheeseburgers at mcdonalds taste the same in japan

...

welp, im going to log off now,

keep the comments coming

ill try to keep finding interesting things to discuss.

check out the album too

sayonara!

day 1: training

so ... i only have 20 mins to update you and my brain has already been overloaded - here goes nothing:
10am: (well, 945 because everything is 15 minutes before so you arent late, thanks mr mac for teaching me early) training begins ... WITH A QUIZ (seems like im back at bates academy)
... - 12:00pm: (because everything is RIGHT on schedule) it was fun
12:00pm: lunch (cooked fried rice and broccoli, it was good. tasted banana bread, it actually had a banana baked in the middle, it was good.
1:00pm ( i mean 12:45) training resumed
... - 7:15pm (we can leave late but and must come early- love it!) training was a blur.
...
not to mention i have TONS of homework and i need to sleep and.... well....
I LOVE THIS!!!!!
...
(sorry it sounds so bad, but i dont have time to write, i will update later)
sayonara
g.

...on life

... today is the first day of the rest of my life.
...
6am : this morning i wake up, and put on my smile of make up, i say a little pray for me, eat breakfast and watch football (the giants killed), then i reread the training materials, this could be really good or REALLY bad.
...
7:30am: i hope in the shower, take a pretty long shower and just think about how good my life is. i am 21 living in a new country, meeting new people, trying new things, loving myself. it is really interesting that for the first time in my life i am "away from God." not literally of course, but i am away from the choice of going to whatever church i want, bible studies all over campus, turning on BET and seeing that hilarious preacher/non-preacher man. in essence, this is going to be the best time of my life.
...
8am: i head to seattles best coffee (yes, that is the local coffee spot) so i can check my email, congratulate my cousin on her proposal, talk to my admissions officer for graduate school (i know, i do too much) and think about life. as i walked over to the coffee shop again, i just had to smile. i am a 21 year old college graduate with a full time job WITH BENEFITS in a new country, that is simply amazing, meeting new people and falling in love with life as if i am a baby not knowing how much negativity exists in the world.
...
i am glad i have this time and this experience. today, i begin work ... which is my first day of training.
...
Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change. Allow me the opportunity to take advantage of every new and exciting situation that I can possibly have in this new country. Let me lean not on my thoughts but look to you for understanding. I appreciate this opportunity. I appreciate this life. I appreciate all of the love I am receiving. Thank you for loving me. Amen.
...
...
...
chat later,
g.

((Rewind))

A lot of people have been asking me why I am in Japan ... well let's try and explain:
...
One day (probably in November) I thought to myself "yikes I graduate soon and I dont have a job nor did I apply to graduate school." Though I do plan on attending graduate school (preferably UVA for a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology) I was not ready to go just yet. So, I decided to take an international job. Of course teaching was not first on my list, I actually considered Human Resources first. However, I did not want to have to commit for 10years to a company that I may not even like.
...
So, after looking at a few sites and talking to a few people I applied to my corporation and got a job offer. Welp, now I had a few job possibilities. But me being me I prayed on it and things happened how they did and now I am here.
...
If you have questions,
just ask.
...
ciao!

the theories of westernization

...
...

It is amazing how the more I travel the more "westernization" I see. Now, don't get me wrong, America is a great place to be... be it visiting or living. However, there are things that I always laugh at when I am overseas...

1. McDonalds

2. Starbucks (haven't seen one yet but there is ...)

3. Seattle's Best Coffee

4. Mr. Donut

Now, though I have only been here a short time, there are some things that need to be in America that arent.

exhibit A:

The irony in this sign is that blind walkers cannot see it. However, I think we need to have those for the other pedestrians because (see next picture) the grooved pavement (yellow) is so the blind can have a path to follow and they know where exactly to cross the street. I think this is a novel(sp?) idea.

Now, the next few things that we need in America are:

1. more bicyclists

2. more walkers

3. more janitors/cleaner people (whichever works)

But, one thing I do love about America that i NEVER realized before ... i think Americans are happier. We seem to smile more than other cultures. I wonder why that is ... its on my list of things to research.

Training starts tomorrow,

wish me luck

love. g.

okayama, japan

...
...
September 7, 2008

As I wake up in a new city, in a new bed, I glance at the clock ... 4:00am. Great, what am I going to do now? I dont have breakfast plans until 9:15am. Yikes! Welp ... might as well give a brief overview of my life so far in Japan.

((rewind))

Saturday - September 6, 2008. I arrive at the Osaka-Kansai International Airport at approx. 5:30pm. Yay, now I get the adventure of going through customs. After waiting for an hour I proceed through immigration for my 30sec. stint in customs. I could get used to this no nonsense living. I meet the Amity Representative and I think ALL of my nerves disapate (sp?). "Hi, I'm Javaria, nice to meet you." Well, Javaria is about 5'8, thin, black, with natural twists. JACKPOT!!!! This will not be so bad. After shipping my luggage to my home school Javaria turns to me and says, "so, you went to Spelman?" I look at her with a bit of confusion and she recognizes my confusion, thus responding "I saw your sweatshirt, I graduated from Morris Brown." Oh - this is fantabulously wonderful, a black chick in Japan (ending her 4th year here) that is from Texas and went to school in the AUC.

...

We walk up to the train that we will be taking to Okayama. As Javaria instructs us to LEAVE OUR LUGGAGE Brian and I look very confused. (worry not, i will "re-introduce" Brian later.) We leave our luggage and proceed to the airconditioned room. Oh, did I fail to mention it is HOT. It is a true detroit humidity added to 90 degree weather at night after it rained, if you dont get that picture, sorry. (lol). After all of the trainage (yes, I said it, TRAINAGE) we get to our "dormitory" and I take a shower and lay down for bed.

...

Now, as for the introductions of the fellow trainees... we have

Brian from Philly

Libby (gov't known as Elizabeth though she doesnt really know Elizabeth is her name) from Cambridge

Shaan from Sydney (my roommate)

Krysta from outside of Toronto

Joel from Alberta (Canada)

Teddy (or Ted) from Minnesota

Nora from Washington (also known as our tour guide, she knows everything about japan)

...

So we meet for breakfast at 9:15 and decide to go find Brian (who is staying in the Tokyo-inn.com hotel across the way, still not sure why) he was surprisingly easy to find. We venture off to the train station and stop in this food market/clothing store/restaurant/cafeteria get up and get breakfast. I decided to eat the chicken and mushroom quiche (has nothing on moms) and it was decent. Shaan and Krysta went for waffles (they were waffle sandwiches, one with ice cream in the middle ... i thought this was breakfast!) Libby, Joel, Teddy and Brian decided to pick their posoin at the pastry shop and Nora (who doesnt eat wheat/whey) went to Heart-In and got some rice (someone please check for me, Im pretty sure there is wheat/whey in rice).

After everyone indulged in their food (me only eating to bites and thinking about how interesting this day will be) we decided to proceed to the map. Now, Nora is the only "japanese enhanced" American. Shaan has lived all over the world and read every possible book on the Japanese World. Joel, he attempts and is quite good I must say. Teddy knows enough to get by. Brian and I just keep making jokes. Krysta is attempting to learn the language. Now, back to this map ... I may not know japanese but i can always tell you where I am and where I am trying to go. So, I look at the map and say "we need to go this way because we are going here." Did anyone listen? Of course not! Mind you, everyone is a stranger to everyone else and we dont know anyones last name. We are all working on faith (or not, since I am the only religious person in the group). So, Nora decides its a good idea to attempt to buy train tickets, I say... its only a 1.5km walk, its not that far. Finally we all come to some common consensus (sp?) to take the street car (or trolly).

After getting on the street car we are attempting to make our way to the castle. However, we had to get off the train and we went into this underground thing for you to cross the street (yes, cross the street). Later Brian and I make jokes about how dumb this is but we follow the group anyway. Now, this underground thing is ridiculously clean. The crazy thing about it is it has a fountain in the middle (where Detroit bums would definitely be showering) and there is a janitor that was walking around cleaning EVERYTHING. You know that smell at Hart Plaza in the basement? Well, it didnt have that! These are the few reasons I love Japan already. When we get into this underground station (for lack of better terminology) we see two girls practicing dancing in sweats - tshirts - and 4inch heels. ((when my adapter starts working I will download the video, so, check back again for that.)) After we walk past those young girls we take a "potty break" and Nora (affectionately titled the tour guide) explains to us what squaters (sp?) are. For those of you reading this that dont know, Japense toilets are in the floor and you squat to use them. Again, when my adapter starts working you will see pictures!

...

We FINALLY make it to the garden. It was quite hot and the steps were quite uneven but we made it safely and it was absolutely beautiful. The view was breathtaking, the atmosphere was serene, I must get used to this quiet lifestyle. While in the castle I even dressed up in traditional Japanese garb and will post those pictures, eventually. (lol - the adapter, I promise its the adapters fault.) After leaving the castle we all decided a drink would be good. So, we stopped at the vending machine (they are all over, its great. they have liquid beverages (even beer) and then there are others for cigarettes, crazy). After leaving the castle we headed to the gardens and they are beautiful. Now, I am not big on gardening; however, I love beautiful scenery. When we first entered the garden we stopped in a random building (still not sure what purpose it serves). As you know, the Japanese culture requires the removal of shoes in just about every building. So, this also mean the Japanese operate on an honor system, for the most part. The funny thing about this whole honor system situation is I love shoes. So, of course, Brian and I had a joke about this occuring in Philly or Detroit ... you better only have beaters because if you wear some of your best sneaks they would NOT be there when you came back. Though this is a sad thought it is quite hilarious when you look at all of the shoes outside/at the entrance of buildings. The Japanese hosts led us to a table in which we consumed "iced tea" (that was delish!) and figs (they are really good, if you havent had them you should try one). We also took a great deal of pictures and looked around at the ikibana (sp?) that was in the building. Welp, we almost overstayed our welcome, but then it started raining so we waited, on the stoop until the rain left. Now, I dont know if anyone has ever experienced a thunderstorm that lasted about 5minutes and then the sun comes out and it feels like it never rained, but, that is a very strange experience. We were finally able to begin our true journey in the garden and it was truly an amazing place - and huge!

...

After leaving the garden we headed back home, but we took a different route. Though madame tour guide was against it, we said "dude, we are in japan, everything is an adventure." When we get back to the underground station thing (also where Brian and I laugh about how it makes no sense) we make our way back to the street car. After getting off of the street car we take a detour to shops 21 which is basically a strip mall that is above ground but surrounded by other shops so it seems to be underground, I guess you had to be there for that to make sense, lol. We look around the electronics store, that was 4 floors and the large plasma flat screens (that may cost thousands in the statements) were max $300, shame. Oh yes - the iphone 3G was $23 and the ipod nano was also $23. After walking through shops 21 we realized it was time to eat again and FINALLY decided on going to this beef bowl place (dont know the name of it, pics of the food to come) where I had rice with beef and onions. The beef tasted like soft cooked pork bacon but it was surprisingly good, and you all know I dont eat beef. But, when in rome, do as the romans, right?

...

Well ... its only 6:25pm here and we are going to a karoake spot at 8:00pm tonight so I will add that to the Monday morning post.

...

Check back often,

love you all

...

sayonara

new.life.

...
...
i have been pondering what i could write during my last days home.
i have been attempting to conjure (sp?) up thoughts good enough to record.
all i can seem to do is thinking about everything i miss.
it is now time for my life to begin.
so many things have happened in my life.
as i jokingly told my mom today, "i sure must be good at baseball;
because life keeps throwing me curve balls and i haven't missed yet."
or have i?
i have yet to be in love, unconditionally - but its on the way.
i have yet to experience let down, to the point where i feel as if im living in shambles.
i have yet to live where all i can breathe is happiness.
this is merely because i have so much living to do.
i am happy.
i am content.
i am anxious.
i am nervous.
i am sad; but,
most importantly -
i am me.
i am taking an adventure, by myself.
i am going to be living, by myself.
i will be starting a new job, by myself.
i will be venturing to another country, by myself.
i am, for once, officially - by-my-self ... and i cannot wait!
i will now experience a new life,
a new love,
a new perspective
on a new hemisphere
in a new region
with a new group of people
wish me luck.
it is time for new life.
...

love,

g.

.true love.

"you never know love until you have met temptation."

D.N.M.

As India.Arie sang, "I am ready for love." I doubt that God is ready for me to experience love because he has not sent my husband, or has He? Have a ruined my chances? Did I do something wrong? Im not even sure why I am so into marriage. I do not want to be exclusive unless marriage is actually an option. I look at some people and (sad to say) have thoughts of jealousy because they look so happy.

Some say my sister lost her husband, but I actually think it was just time for my brother to go, God needed him more than we did. She grieved. She mourned. She moved on. At this juncture, the new beau may in fact be better than that last. How could I possible think anyone is better than my brother? Easy, my brother was a beast! He was that sugarhoneyicedtea ... if you know what I mean. But new beau is a beast as well. I dont know him like I know my brother. But I like him because she does. I love for you as long as you love for yourself. Its always good to click with the siblings people and I feel I did.

In my spirit I hope they do tie the knot; not even a production, just vows between the crew. Im happy for them .... true love exists.

though "hearts will never be practical until they are made unbreakable."

sometimes you have to go through something to receive something.

im ready.

wilting lil(l)ie(s)

...

"Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change..."

...

...

...

A mother. A daughter. A sister. A fighter.

She was truly a lily ... blooming into a wonderful flower.

She was more than important.

Small and tiny; she was fiesty.

There are no words ...

My lil(lie)y has wilted away.

...

Lillie Mae (Jordan) Tabor

september 15, 1919 - august 21, 2008

...

...

...

Rest in peace "Doll"

.moth.butterfly.

Lord, walk with me as I travel the various stages of life.

Feed me when I am helpless.

Protect me when I am weak.

Talk to me when I am lonely.

Bless me when I am in need of work and love.

Make me patient when progress is steady and consistent.

Make me impatient with mediocrity and madness.

Energize me with possibility.

When you determine the time is right, let me spread my wings like a butterfly and let me fly to the glory of God.

Free me Jesus from the prison of my mind. Free me from the fears that chain me from creativity.

Release me and I will praise your name with my mind, body and soul.

Through Jesus Christ our Lord we pray.

Amen."

((a prayer: written by Rev. Nicholas Hood, III;

Plymouth United Church of Christ; Detroit, MI))

...

...

...

Usually I do not read my horoscopes, but if I do and they are actually corresponding with my wants and desires for my life, I simply smile and chuckle while reading. Well, today I picked up Shore magazine, a style and culture magazine for the Lake Michigan. As I read the "shorecast" I actually had to reread it because it was so accurate.

...

Shorecast [scorpio]

KEYWORDS in August: High Tide.

Understand whom you are, where you are, and what you - and you alone- can do to turn the seaworthy craft you're on, around. Maximize your skill, your talent, your fearlessness. SUccess comes in over calm waters.

Sidestep: uninvited points-of-view

...

...

Shorecast [scorpio]

KEYWORDS in September: The New Agenda

As it turns out, its your secret agenda. A personal favorite, this is where you plan your newest endeavors. Keen detail exists. And only the most trusted confidants are called in.

Sidestep: severe self-criticism when there's a lull in action.

...

...

...

Wow - these horoscopes are actually almost frightening. I feel like God himself wrote them and placed them in my hand to read, on this day. And, as a matter of fact, he did, because everything is in divine order.

...

These whole journey to Japan business is actually very calming for me. Though this is new turf, more than a new city, more than a new state - it is a new country, I am ready for the adventure. When I applied for this new job it was just little old me thinking "why not?" Well later on, people started asking me why. Of course, most of the time, I had my standard intellectual answer that was long and drawn out, true, but not the emotional/spiritual or mental reason I was going. When I applied for this job I prayed about it and I knew if God gave me this opportunity there was a reason I needed to go. Well, of course I got the job and still did not know the reason. Well ... I think Japan is going to be my rainbow. This entire summer and college, as a whole, if you will, has been a storm for me. As the summer comes to an end the hail gets bigger and hits hard, the lightning becomes brighter and more powerful and the thunder becomes louder and more voistrous. What is happening in my life? Did I do something wrong to someone? Am I missing something here? Well ... the more things happen, the calmer I become. The Lord is truly working in my life.

...

It is time to embark on this journey ... figure out who Garnet really is and what she really wants. No, I am not putting an end to my seflessness, but I am chiming in on the SELF that is disregarded. Everything is pointing in my favor . . . why not listen, watch and take advantage. I am ready to find the happiness that I have been living for. I am ready to begin living for today, for now. I am ready to begin living for me.

...

I once was a moth, possibly ... but for so long I have felt the butterfly within me and I have finally realized I am free to fly.

...

love.

g.

Storms. Sunshine.

"There comes a point in your life when you realize:

who matters, who never did, who won't anymore and who always will.

Stop worrying about people from your past

because there is a reason why they did not make it to your future.

Be kinder than necessary

because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle."

. . .

It is often interesting to receive forwarded e-mails. Though they say "forward to those you love" or "send this before you have bad luck" it is very rare that I forward, or share, previously forwarded emails. As I embark on the new journeys of my life I have taken a lot of time, practically devoted my entire summer, to reading between the lines. I read between the lines on relationships - both platonic and romantic. I read between the lines on education and choices. I read between the lines on the lyrics of music. I read between the lines on sibling rivalries. I read between the lines on life and death.

. . .

In all of these reading and rhetoric, it is hard for me to digest my findings. The more I love the more I lose. The more I read the more I forget. The more I listen to music, the more I go deaf. The more I make note of sibling rivalries, the more acknowledgement I receive on the matter. The more I try to live, the more I see death.

. . .

The irony of this storm is it is the happiest saddest time in my life.