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[22 october 2008]
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"my eyes are green, 'cuz I eat a lot of vegetables"
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2 months, soon approaching, but so much has been revealed.
i have realized i have been lying to myself for far too long.
ok, maybe not lying, that sounds extreme.
but i was sure scared to be introduced to myself.
have you ever been introduced to yourself?
it is a very strange reality check.
but since i have been in japan, i have realized quite a few things about myself.
... here goes something (or nothing, depending on how you look at it, i consider it positive improvement, but you can consider it negative reinforcement.)
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1. my name is garnet, it means red, it also means flower and it is also a stone, but in japanese its ganetto (though they can actually say garnet, its kind of funny)
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2. my middle name is terri (no im not giving u the full government) and my aunt used to call me little terri, i honestly hated it because i thought she just didnt know my name. i also hated it because i was not little terri, that meant i wasnt an individual.
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3. i love to read. whoever told me i couldnt understand stuff lied, lol, just kidding, i really cant. but i like reading. i may not remember what i read before but i like reading in the moment, the revelations are amazing.
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4. im a control freak. why didn't you all tell me this? sheesh! its an interesting control freak-ism though. but it explains a lot.
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5. i hold family in the highest esteem. no i dont talk to my family every day, but cross them and its not a good look for u.
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6. i love to write. im not that good at it but i love doing it.
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7. i love teaching, maybe not in the professional setting, but i love helping out the people that have not had a chance to help themselves out.
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8. i love love. i am in love. thats all!
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9. i have a best friend. (no mo, not u, lol) that best friend means more to me than i ever realized. that friend epitomizes the ((garnet)) definition of a best friend ... maybe tutu or someone said this, but, the defintion being "the person that knows u best."
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10. i met my soul mate once. i just now realized i didnt want to be with him forever; HOWEVER, he was a mirror for me, the person that showed me everything that was holding me back, the person that brought me to my own attention so i could change my life.
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11. i wear my wishbone where my backbone should be.
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12. im a dreamer.
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13. im determined.
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14. im very focused. people often told me i was not focused and i had thoughts all over the place but my mom saw it, everything i do comes back to the same goal.
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15. last (for now) "I'm scared of the future because of the scar the past left on my heart, so its hard for me to open my present and accept it as a gift..." (c) Garnet 2008
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this is my post for today,
love.
2 comments:
Great realizations... Now all you have to do is remain conscious of them so that you can use them (or not, depending on which one it is) to help you through life!
this is Mo, you are a good writer and there may have been a time when comprehension was an issue but not any more...I am surprised you are holding on to that position...you have proven otherwise.
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